An In-Depth Look into Guilt and its Links to Functional Problems

An In-Depth Look into Guilt and its Links to Functional Problems

In this article you will find:

• The meaning of Guilt
• How Guilt can manifest in our daily lives, and its effects on our four universal bodies: Mental, Emotional, Physical, and Spiritual
• Origin and history of Guilt
• Liberating ourselves from Guilt
• Exercises to help us overcome Guilt and its consequences

• The meaning of Guilt:

The meaning of Guilt is closely related to the mechanisms by which it appears, and Guilt emerges in three situations:

• When we are at fault of having committed an error, crime, or offense: This is Real Guilt
• When Guilt is unfairly imposed on us by someone, to achieve a desired result through blame and manipulation: Imposed Guilt
• When a present situation, similar in some way to previous events when we felt Guilt (real or imposed), activates in the present moment a series of processes in our organisms associated with feelings, emotions and memories linked to the past Guilt, making us feel Guilty again.

• How Guilt can manifest in our daily lives, and its effects on our four universal bodies: Mental, Emotional, Physical, and Spiritual

 Guilt, whether real or imposed, manifests in us through a series of physical sensations, thoughts, and emotions, that culminate in the sense of feeling responsible, regretful, and sorry for an offense that may be false or true. Guilt, sometimes, can also bring about other feelings such as injustice or incomprehension and, with that, it can cause even greater discomfort.

When we are blamed and not given the opportunity to be excused and forgiven that can increase even more the feelings of unfairness and sadness. Also, knowing or suspecting that the other person is disappointed or suffering, can cause another series of emotions, for example, shame, desolation, and unhappiness.

In its extreme forms, when Guilt is severe, false, unfair, manipulative or imaginary, it can even lead to a series of psychological, emotional, spiritual, and physical discomforts, including functional disorders. As such, Guilt can affect our lives, our well-being, our health and our spiritual development, particularly if we do not release ourselves from it and allow it to remain rooted in our being.

When we are unjustly shamed and blamed repeatedly and we feel discrepancies between our emotions and actions, our third chakra, Solar Plexus and our Gut feeling can fall out of balance, as we are not honoring this essential part of our being, where relevant emotions and thoughts get represented. If this happens frequently, throughout our lives, we can begin to create a distorted view of our “right to act” and our will, with consequent difficulties and fears expressing our needs, desires, wishes, and our truth. We forget to fight for our ideals, we feel ashamed of our aspirations, behaviors, and actions, affecting the full realization of our being and our soul's mission. Our journey of self-transformation and self-growth, our independence, autonomy, and our self-esteem can get compromised.

Physically, when we become people complacent, trying to always fulfill the wishes of others, forgetting our needs and desires, our bodies can manifest these issues through lack of energy, gastrointestinal problems such as irritable bowel syndrome, depression, eating problems, weight problems, stomach ulcers, muscle spasms, muscle tension and bruxism (jaw clenching).

When chronic, severe, and unresolved, Guilt can block our true emotions, thoughts, and behaviors, making us succumb to present and future external impositions, causing self-perpetuating damaging cycles that can potentially trigger permanent psychological and psychosomatic sequelae. You must then analyze how Guilt is affecting your well-being in the present moment and how it can affect your future.

• Origin and history of our Guilt

To understand the origin of Guilt is important to dive into our history and previous experiences. Reflect then:

• In your past, were you frequently criticized, blamed, or shamed, perhaps by your parents, caregivers, society, friends, neighbors, or schoolteachers?
• Were you judged often?
• Who were the authoritarian figures in your life? And,
  • Did they try to get you to do their will often, even when you did not want to?
  • How did you react to this authoritarian position? With rebellion or with obedience?
  • If you obeyed, were you feeling conflictive between your inner desires, your love and respect for the authoritarian figures, and your actions?

From a psychological perspective, generally, after having experienced Guilt frequently during our childhood, adolescence, and youth, two types of patterns of responses are formatted in our minds, especially in the face of Imposed Guilt:

• A part of our self may feel hurt, criticized, ashamed, judged, misunderstood, wronged and very sad, giving origin to our “Wounded Self”.
• We may create protective or defensive layers in order not to feel the pain associated with Guilt, shame, judgment, and injustice. These protective responses may manifest in the form of submission, obedience, detachment, rebellion, fight or flight, for example.

Therefore, it is recommended to understand our past and current responses in front of Guilt.

• Liberating ourselves from Guilt

 How to embark then on the path towards releasing Guilt?

In the face of Real Guilt, we must apologize deeply and honestly and through a process of self-analysis look at the causes that triggered our mistake, not to repeat them in the future.

In the case of Imposed Guilt, the first step is to recognize the need to forgive ourselves, not depending on other's forgiveness, since others may not wish to excuse us because, as stated earlier, the imposition of false Guilt is intended to make us act in a certain way, satisfactory to others. Our excuse will not appease the other’s true desire, which is manipulation. Trying to seek the excuse of a person who is not genuinely looking at our true intentions and do not wish our well-being, is not a path that will be easily achieved, in fact, it is almost impossible, and will only occur when the other person is ready and willing to listen to us with compassion, understanding and objectivity.

So, we must be able to apologize ourselves, know, and understand what an apology means: to apologize or to excuse someone is to remove the blame from them. And how do you remove the Guilt from yourself? Knowing that you did the best you could at that moment, with the level of wisdom you had.

Even when we did the best we could, some people are concerned about the karma generated by their actions, because yes, even when one has the right intention and acts in the best way possible for that moment and that situation, it can still generate karma (negative consequences of one’s actions). It may be worth asking then: Does winter apologize for causing the death of flowers and plants? Does the wind apologize for eroding stones, rocks and mountains?

Let us look at it from a different perspective: Think for a moment about accidentally stepping on someone else's toes. The pain you caused was unintentional and the result of your best step at that moment. So, you should apologize, but you should not feel Guilty about it, even if the person tries to shame you about it.

We should not feel Guilty or apologetic for following your dharma. If we are sure we are responding to and honoring our dharma, our essence, the fire and mission of our souls, we should not feel guilty. But if we still believe we need forgiveness, then ask the creator force of the universe, that permeates and knows everything, including the true intentions of every person and everything in existence. Across religions, cultures and through the ages, the only true forgiveness comes from The Creator, not from another human being, because each person looks at events through their unique lens, that includes the perspective of that person's Uku Pacha. So, another person's lack of apology may be the result of their unresolved Uku Pacha, lack of self-knowledge, lack of compassion, empathy or understanding about themselves and the other. You cannot expect an apology from a person who doesn't have the necessary tools or knowledge to offer it. If you are certain that the karma generated by your actions was a consequence of following your soul's mission, and that it was not ill intended, then you have divine excuse.

So, the process of self-reflection around Guilt is vital. Look at your intentions objectively, and critically, asking for reconciliation when you truly made a mistake. Also, acknowledge that depending on the other’s forgiveness to feel happy and at peace may lead you to an end road, filled with even more negative emotions, such as disappointment, because they may truly be incapacitated to offer their pardon. The most important question then is: Are you able to forgive yourself and recognize you did the best you could?

• Exercises to help us overcome Guilt and its consequences: 

• Reflect about the experiences of your Younger Self or Wounded Self around Guilt, learning about the emotions, thoughts and bodily sensations associated with your injured parts. Connect also with your Inner Master, that part of your being capable of having a wise and objective view of the pressing events. To achieve these goals there are various meditations, visualizations and breathing exercises, some of which are found in our Holocene Practices. 

• Think about and notice how it feels in your body to acknowledge all the people who love you, respect you, appreciate you and offer you unconditional support. 

• Create a list of all your positive qualities, virtues, and skills. 

• Write about your story, remembering and reflecting about why you made the decisions in that specific manner and acted a certain way, so you can decide neutrality if your actions were serving your soul's mission and your divine purpose. 

• Consider what will happen if you are not forgiven. Feel in your body the emotions, sensations, and thoughts that appear when you imagine not being forgiven, remembering that some of these processes may be linked to your Younger Self, and that pardon may depend on a person who is not ready or capable to offer it. So, become comfortable with the possibility of not being forgiven, immerse yourself in it, and explore any fears that may arise, its origins, any projections from the past, or previous conditionings associated with the resistance to accept unforgiveness. 

• Trust yourself, find a comfortable place in your body where self-acceptance and self-trust lives. Honoring your inner wisdom is as necessary steps to overcome the demon of Guilt implanted in us. 

• Practice physical exercises that enhance and magnify your energy, your courage, determination, and your will. 

• Train honoring your will, expressing your desires, your needs, and your true wishes on a daily basis, as often as possible. 

• Become comfortable acting independently of public opinion. Learn to accept criticism and rejection from others, remembering that these behaviors are part of human psychology, and frequently encountered while living. 

• Excel at communication. Learn to express your truth, including anger whenever necessary, with kindness, respect and determination, as right speech is paramount to be able to reconcile our human differences. 

• Experiment trying to minimize the need for security, emotional and material attachment. 

• Exercise creating healthy boundaries and affirming your will. Notice the consequences of these behaviors in your emotions, bodily sensations, and your life satisfaction overall. 

• Recite simple mantras that manifest your will and your essence, for example: 

"I respect, honor and offer gratitude to my intuition, my needs, my desires and my rights"

"I have the right to do, and I can do whatever I yearn and desire",

"My desires and needs are as important or more important than the desires and needs of others because only by honoring my will and caring for myself, I will be able to have a life full of health and well-being, and thus I will be able to offer the same to others”

“The power of the Fire lives within me and destroys all my fears, shames, Guilts and residues of a manipulative past”. 

Contact me if you wish us to practice together!

As always,

At Your Service,

Yadira Velazquez, MD

Image: Masks by Wylielise_db